


baby, that's the fun of me.

by thiyatrack (thxyx)



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bikers, Attempt at Humor, Crushes, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Miscommunication, Multi, Mutual Pining, but they're all very soft, jeno be model student by day, side markhyuck, spoicy biker by night
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-26 16:54:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21871666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thxyx/pseuds/thiyatrack
Summary: there’s another thing that’s confusing him. college jeno makes jaemin want to take him out on dates and hug him tight and lounge with him on lazy saturdays and watch bad movies with him. biker jeno makes jaemin want to be pinned against a wall and kissed senseless.yet it feels wrong to be crushing on biker jeno. because biker jeno isn’t college jeno. and yet he is. because they’re both jeno. and jaemin isn’t in the right headspace to process that information.
Relationships: Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin
Comments: 19
Kudos: 213
Collections: DreamXmas 2019





	baby, that's the fun of me.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jaesquared](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaesquared/gifts).



> isa, love, merry christmas! i initially interpreted your prompt as cyclists but then my sister confused me and made me think you meant motorbikes instead and by the time i asked for a clarification, i was over halfway through the fic, so i'm really sorry.
> 
> i hope you enjoy it regardless! <3

“don’t you trust me?”

there’s no pause, no moment of hesitation. hell, not even a _second_ of hesitation. “no.”

jaemin puts his hand over the page of the book that jeno hasn’t even looked up from. “lee jeno, you don’t trust _me?_ ” his tone is pleading, because he’s at this point, he’s desperate, and the one person who he trusts blindly has completely blindsided him.

this time, there’s a pause, and jeno’s irises flick upwards to peer at jaemin over his wire-rimmed spectacles. it could be that he detects the slightest amount of doubt clouding jaemin’s expression, but his gaze softens. “of course i trust you, you loser, but i’m not going to join you if there’s biking involved. my brain is the only part of myself that i value and i don’t want to end up with it splattered all over the pavement.”

an evil grin ripples across jaemin’s face, effectively dispelling whatever vulnerability he had accidentally let leach onto his face. “oh, so there’s no _other_ part of yourself that you value?”

the suggestive wink thrown in his direction causes jeno’s face to crumple into a frown, eyes moving back to the text in the most disgruntled manner. “this conversation is over. you brought this upon yourself.”

“no, no, no, jen, you can’t do that!” jaemin flaps his hands in front of jeno’s face, causing the latter to look up again, though this time, the slightest bit more annoyed. “hear me out. these guys are like totally and completely harmless. like yes, they _do_ dress the part and have like tattoos and piercings and leather jackets and eyeliner but they’re _really_ completely harmless. softies, even.”

jeno’s will is wavering. jaemin can see it on his face, so he plows on, putting down the one piece of information that he knows will win jeno over. “if you don’t believe me, the last time, one of them was talking about how maybe during a later meeting, we could stop off at the pet shop before we went for our usual trip to the fields located at the city limits.”

jeno’s eyes widen in wonder. “pet shop?” he repeats, and jaemin knows he didn’t hear any of the rest of his sentence, but jaemin isn’t to blame for that, so he just nods indulgently. “i could text him, you know, ask if maybe we could do that tonight.”

jeno struggles with himself for a long minute, before breaking eye contact with jaemin and shaking his head. “pass.”

“pass?” echoes jaemin incredulously. “you were nearly on board! there are cats involved!”

“yeah, but like,” jeno shrugs in a manner he assumes to be nonchalant, but jaemin knows he’s pointedly looking at the book because he doesn’t want to betray the already known fact that everything to do with cats is anything but nonchalant to lee jeno. “i won’t fit in at all. i dress like...this.”

jaemin’s eyes travels from the collar of jeno’s maroon checked button-down with the top button undone to his neatly creased trousers, trying to find out why exactly jeno makes that statement as though it’s a fault. maybe in the given context, but jaemin thinks jeno is meant to stick out even if he does conform to the regular clothing norms. “i don’t see anything wrong with it. you could show up like that, you know. i show up in my tracks and hoodies. just gotta be proud of your sense of fashion.”

jeno just shakes his head slowly, scrunching his nose up in an adorable way that jaemin should be immune to by now, but his heart still jolts in his chest. “nah, i’m not secure enough for that.”

jaemin nods. “that’s also valid. what if we got you a leather jacket, maybe some eyeliner, just so you could look the part? would that, plus the pet shop thing, be enough to convince you to come along?”

jeno nods, slowly at first and then surely, a small smile turning up the corners of his lips. “i suppose.”

“i knew i could count on you, you fucking legend,” jaemin lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, leaning forward to press his lips to jeno’s cheek. “the joy of not being the designated third wheel anymore, oh, the joy is immeasurable!”

jeno giggles at jaemin’s extravagant hand gestures accompanying that exclamation, waving as his eyes fall back to his book as jaemin saunters out of the library with a newly restored spring to his step.

after dinner, jaemin shows up at jeno’s room at 8 p.m. sharp, only to be greeted with a bemused _why are you never on time for literally anything else?_

jaemin almost forgets to answer, because jeno is in a light white tee and skinny jeans that he probably borrowed from his hot roommate yangyang, and the neurons in jaemin’s body momentarily forget how to form thoughts and translate them into actual speech.

“jen, let me tell you,” he sighs dramatically, once the function of speech has been restored to him. “if you’ve ever been around donghyuck’s flirting - or rather, _attempts_ to flirt using half-baked insults and cheesy comments - for over an hour, then you’d be taking all measures to make sure that you’d have company so that you wouldn’t have to undergo that torture alone.” he hands over the leather jacket that he picked up from yerim earlier. “i’ve sat through his bullshit alone on _three_ separate occasions, _hours_ at a stretch. i’m no longer going to stand for that. or sit for it.”

jeno laughs at the bad joke as he puts the jacket on, twirling once with his eyebrows raised, a non-verbal request for feedback. jaemin just nods appreciatively, the option of speech once again void because jeno in a leather jacket just… hits differently. so jaemin just nods some more, hoping that his words will eventually be restored to his dry throat.

yangyang walks out of the bedroom, in boxers and a shirt that he’s wearing inside out. he evidently doesn’t have any plans for the night. he manages to put some of jaemin’s feelings into words when he chooses to remark, “woah, woah, woah, lee, looking spicy!”

jeno awkwardly laughs, shooting finger guns in his direction, and jaemin just shakes his head. “don’t do that.”

“don’t do… this?” asks jeno, turning to jaemin and repeating the action.

“exactly, don’t do that,” clarifies jaemin. “doesn’t fit the vibe.”

jeno sighs. “if you say so.” he looks over at yangyang, who’s currently pouring orange juice into a bowl of cereal. “liu, can you do my eyeliner?”

“eyeliner and the leather jacket? you’re going to kill every person who looks at you when you walk out that door,” grins yangyang, lazily blowing his bangs out of his eyes.

“can you shut up?” hisses jeno, color rising to his cheeks, evidently not used to compliments like those.

yangyang wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. “nah, i’m actually considering asking you if you want to make out with me before you leave. for that rugged, disheveled look, you know. there’s only so much eyeliner can do, sometimes you gotta go the extra mile.”

“woah, woah, woah,” reacts jaemin instinctively, throwing an arm front of a laughing jeno. “we’re leaving now.”

“you gonna fight me for him, na?” challenges yangyang teasingly, walking over to the kitchen pantry to pull out his eyeliner. “of course, the fact that i’m generally lucky when it comes to winning fights counters the fact that i have noodle arms, so maybe best two out of three?”

“we wouldn’t need a third set, liu,” says jaemin, voice laden with fake cockiness. “anyone who wants to get with jeno has to go through me.” they have an agreement. jaemin may have phrased it in the most dramatic way possible but that was the essence of it.

it was about two months into their first semester, when jeno got his heart broken for the first time by an unbelievably charming boy. jaemin had always been very suspicious of charming people, mostly because he was often associated with that adjective himself.

of course, there _had_ been other reasons that jaemin had been suspicious of jeno’s former person of interest, reasons that had only become more intense and deep-rooted over the years, but even setting those aside (“i swear, donghyuck, i’m _just_ infatuated with him, nothing serious at all. really.”), jaemin maintains that he had all the objective reasons to not trust that boy.

jeno had been so heartbroken, it had marked the first time that he had proceeded to subject himself to a form of self-destructive behavior that jaemin has since only seen jeno turn to only during times of deep, deep despair - drinking jaemin’s coffee order. once the caffeine had worn off and jaemin had calmly explained to jeno that feeling like you are vibrating at the frequency of sound _is_ a common reaction to his coffee, they had come to an agreement that neither of them should date anyone else without the other’s approval.

it was the first (and only) time that jeno has ever admitted that jaemin had been right.

“baby, this isn’t a bodyguard au,” laughs yangyang, hopping onto the table and gesturing to jeno to take the chair opposite him. “and you can best bet that i’d be a great match for jeno.”

“you eat cereal with orange juice,” deadpans jaemin.

“i’ve seen you drink what i’m assuming is acid with lethal doses of sucrose in it, and you call that coffee,” shoots back yangyang. “how do i even know you’re human? ooh! maybe this is one of those fantasy extraterrestrial aus instead!” 

“between the fact that i’m being blatantly objectified, jaemin’s unearned confidence, and the fact that i’m now pretty sure you read aus on twitter, i just don’t know what to comment on,” remarks jeno, nose scrunched in amusement before yangyang taps him on the nose to make him stop moving any other part of his face which could interfere with his sophisticated eyeliner technique.

“all done!” jeno can hear the grin in yangyang’s voice, despite keeping his eyes closed. “just give it a minute and then open your eyes.” between his contacts and his keeping his eyes shut, the world swims as jeno opens his eyes, and he blinks slowly, registering jaemin watching him with an expression that he’s never seen before, but before he can properly register it, jaemin goes back to his easy grin and jeno wonders if he imagined it.

“looking extremely spicy, lee, we talking pure, unadulterated capsaicin here,” says yangyang as jeno turns to him to see if his eyeliner came out alright. “on a serious note, never eat raw capsaicin. you won’t be able to taste anything for a while.”

“based on a true story?” confirms jaemin, grimacing.

“you know me,” says yangyang, winking. “i’ve never done a single biotech project without accidentally ingesting something.”

“dear god,” sighs jeno. he turns to jaemin. “let’s go?”

it takes jeno less than two minutes to start hesitating again. “i’m not getting on _that._ ”

jaemin mounts the bike that he’s borrowed from jaehyun, his older brother, putting his helmet on as he raises his eyebrows. “and why not? i told you this was a biker gang. did you expect bikes to not be involved?”

“yeah, but i’m looking at it right now and severely doubting my own judgement,” says jeno, gesturing to the large bike. “i don’t trust you to ride that, that’s all.”

“trust me when i say i’m very good at riding things,” replies jaemin, winking saucily.

“you’re a virgin,” deadpans jeno, clearly unamused.

jaemin straps on his helmet and turns away, sulking. “you don’t know that.”

“fine, tell me i’m wrong then,” challenges jeno with a grin.

“you’re not, but you _are_ wrong about not trusting me.” jaemin thrusts a second helmet in jeno’s direction, but jeno doesn’t take it, eyeing it warily. “jen, have you ever regretted trusting me?”

“yes!” replies jeno immediately. jeno’s immediate replies always hurt. huge ouch. he could at least _pretend_ to hesitate. “remember when you said volunteering at the animal shelter on the day my allergy meds got over was completely okay and that i’d be fine if i just _believed?_ ”

“hell, don’t blame me if you didn’t believe hard enough,” shrugs jaemin nonchalantly, tossing the helmet to jeno, thereby compelling him to catch it. “anything’s possible if you believe. i hated milk, and guess what? i’m now lactose intolerant.”

“i’m ninety nine percent sure that isn’t how it works, the one percent concession only owing to the fact that i’m not a biology or a psychology major,” says jeno, almost sounding defiant but he’s already put on the helmet. “i’m trusting that you won’t get us both killed. nothing more, nothing less.”

“that’s not a lot to ask for, we can manage that,” smiles jaemin as jeno gets on the bike behind him.

“best believe i’m going to accidentally break your ribs though,” mutters jeno as he slides his arms around jaemin’s waist, an action that does _not_ affect jaemin in any way, or rather, that’s what he tries to tell himself. he can feel jeno’s chest pressed up against his back, jeno’s chin resting on his shoulder, jeno’s warm breathing fluttering over his neck, and wills his heart to resume beating at a normal rhythm.

“that’s fine,” chokes out jaemin, revving up the bike. “guess we’re dying one way or the other.”

“jaemin? jaemin!” screeches jeno as soon as the words register, but jaemin merely laughs and accelerates, and they’re off.

jeno keeps his head buried in jaemin’s shoulder all the way until they get there, despite jaemin’s yells of _jen, look up! seriously, jen, you’ve got to feel the wind on your face to really enjoy this, c’mon!_ and his legs are shaky as he dismounts the bike. “this was a bad idea,” he whispers. “a bad idea.”

“you didn’t even get to actually experience it,” whines jaemin, pouting. “you just didn’t look up at all the entire time. that’s stupid. and also, in your face. _told you_ i wouldn’t get us killed.”

“well, this is the only time i’m glad you were right about something,” retorts jeno, looking up at the abandoned building that they’ve parked in front of, and he almost wants to laugh at the fact that it looks exactly as he imagined it would. there are three bikes parked next to jaemin’s in a neat row.

as they approach the side door of the building, jeno is about to hesitate (for only the eight thousandth time that day), wondering if it’s too late to turn around, but jaemin has a premonition, reaching out to grab jeno’s hand just as the latter is about to turn heel and head back to the bikes.

there’s an annoying smirk on jaemin’s face as he intertwines his fingers with jeno’s, prompting jeno to try and shake jaemin’s hand off. jaemin lets him, pulling his hand back with a frown. “fine, leave, if you really don’t wanna be here that bad.”

jaemin’s pout takes effect in less than one and a half seconds, and jeno pulls jaemin’s hand back with a huff, gritting out a “just for today, no more,” as jaemin’s face melts back into a smile as he knocks on the door.

two people open the door, and jeno is immediately struck by the fact that one of them is shorter than him by the same amount that the other is taller than him, and yet, of the two, the shorter one looks ten times more intimidating than the taller one.

“yukhei, injunnie!” grins jaemin, bright smile directed from the tall one to the short one, whose eyes drop to jaemin’s and jeno’s entwined fingers, prompting jeno to drop jaemin’s hand immediately as though fearing judgement. the short one simply shakes his head negligibly at jeno, hints of a smile dancing at the corners of his lips, but jeno doesn’t take jaemin’s hand again.

jeno’s quickly acquainted with the one who are already present - renjun, yukhei, chenle and jisung - and jaemin seems to have a collection of odd facts about each of them. 

renjun used to be a street racer but gave it up before he turned into an adult. he looks really intimidating with his five piercings on each ear and tattoo of an alien on his right bicep, but his favorite movie is you’ve got mail. he’s easily the best biker there (“oh, _please,_ yukhei, no one in this room is going to argue about that,” sighs jisung when jaemin makes that statement. yukhei musters up his best puppy eyes and jisung shrugs, “okay, maybe you’re equal. but you’re not better than injunnie and you know it.”), and he can do crazy stunts on his bike that none of the others (except yukhei) can even attempt.

yukhei is an honor student who started biking because he needed an escape from his strict home and parents, and he’s the one who wants to stop off at the pet shop, thereby prompting jeno to immediately decide that yukhei’s his favorite. he reminds jeno of a large overexcited puppy with the way he gestures when he talks and finds everything amusing. definitely his favorite.

chenle and jisung are neighbours, and jisung tags along with chenle to every biking meet-up because jisung hero-worships renjun, an open secret in the group, something that everyone loves making fun of jisung for (another secret in the group is that chenle actually indulges jisung when he asks to come along to each meet-up because he has a big fat crush on him, but that’s an actual secret just between jaemin and chenle). 

chenle actually moved to south korea because he won a talent show on chinese television and was brought here to train to be a k-pop idol before he decided that kind of life wasn’t for him. he’s still mildly famous, because he only decided to quit after he had done a bunch of commercials and one survival show. none of that shows on him, though, as he casually blows his orange bangs out of his face, laughing at jisung and yukhei clowning jaemin rattling off random facts about each of them.

jaemin and yukhei start telling a story involving jisung and a hamster and jeno finds that most of his apprehension has drained out of him, and his muscles are more relaxed as he sits next to jaemin, his back leaning against the wall and a new familiarity beginning to blanket him.

donghyuck walks in with a boy that jeno identifies as mark only because of jaemin’s extensive descriptions of donghyuck’s extensive descriptions of how he’s in love with every feature of mark’s personality, as well as mark’s face (“the lip ring, jen,” jaemin had brought up with exasperation once, “i swear hyuck’s obsessed with it. i tell him it’s gonna feel hella weird when they’re making out but apparently he’s into that? no judgement from me.”).

the lip ring is lowkey attractive though. jeno tries to stop himself from imagining what it would be like to make out with that in the way. too late. jeno’s eyebrows scrunch together. maybe not.

donghyuck looks from jeno to jaemin, nodding impressively. “didn’t actually believe him when he said you were coming along, jen. maybe jaemin does have magical abilities after all.”

jeno straightens his posture, trying to smirk. he’s been attempting a dark, serious vibe all this time, not talking or smiling that much, and he will not have donghyuck exposing his dorkish side. despite the fact that he has now learned that the others are nothing like he expected them to be, jeno is determined to keep the persona he picked out for himself. “i see no reason to think that i wouldn’t be into something like this, donghyuck.”

donghyuck gives him a once-over, amusement dancing in his eyes, and jeno thinks he’s going to call him out by saying something like _oh, baby, i have a whole list of reasons,_ or something characteristically donghyuck, but he doesn’t, choosing instead to indulge jeno, nodding and shrugging. “yeah, you’re right, you fit right in.”

jeno can feel jaemin relax next to him and figures that if donghyuck had called jeno out then that would’ve ruined the possibility of jeno showing up for any following biking meetings, and that wouldn’t have been good for jaemin, who would’ve gone back to third-wheeling.

“donghyuck was saying that he wants to go to the lake today,” drawls mark, the corner of his lip drawn into a half smile as he looks at donghyuck, who’s expectantly bouncing on the balls of his feet while looking pleadingly at renjun, who scoffs, and then smiles. “no way.”

“i do,” nods donghyuck excitedly.

“oh _no,_ don’t be that person,” says renjun, the smile quickly dropping from his face as he shakes his head. “did mark put this idea into your head?”

“yeah, but what does that have to do with anything?” shrugs donghyuck, supposedly innocent. “it seems like a really cool place, and if it’s just outside city limits then it’s a great place to go, right?”

yukhei shakes his head. “we told mark that the only way that he’d get us to go to the lake was if he managed to convince one other person that it was a good idea, and you must know it really isn’t a good idea if none of us actually agreed, right? it’s crazy, people say the lake is haunted.”

“yeah, but you don’t actually believe in that, do you? it’ll be great, c’mon,” nudges mark.

jeno squints at donghyuck, who he knows as the biggest scaredy cat on the planet, but because donghyuck didn’t expose him earlier (and also because donghyuck is now staring at him with a steely glint in his eye reminding him of his good deed), jeno decides to cut him a break. 

they end up going, because renjun is a man of his word, and since he _did_ tell mark that they could go if he managed to convince one other person, and he’s forced to concede - after a lot of exaggerated deliberating from him and scandalized glares from donghyuck - that donghyuck does indeed qualify as a _person._

yukhei still wants to go to the pet shop, even after renjun makes the accusation that he only wants to go there because he has a crush on the person who’ll be working the store at this time (or rather, the only person who’ll let them into the pet shop after closing hours, since the person in question also happens to be renjun’s sister).

“i actually don’t, but i suppose i can add her to the list,” jokes yukhei. “there’s only seven other people that you guys think i have a crush on.”

“whatever,” huffs renjun. “if the lake turns out to be haunted, i swear i’m going to slash mark’s tyres and leave.” he turns to donghyuck, who’s giving him a shit-eating grin. renjun tries to look authoritative as he sticks his finger in donghyuck’s direction threateningly, but the effect is slightly ruined by the fact that his finger is trembling. “and i’m going to slash your face.”

“okay, baby, sure,” nods donghyuck, with the same grin.

“i hate you,” sniffs renjun as he grabs his helmet and walks to the door. “you losers coming or what?”

yukhei laughs at the confused look on jeno’s face as his eyes follow renjun’s retreating back. “he’s just scared, that’s all. injunnie believes in ghosts and aliens and all things supernatural, love that for him. i hope you don’t think he’s scary or something.”

jeno’s eyes take in yukhei’s ripped jeans, jacket with skulls on it, his smudged eyeliner, his black lipstick and the scar on his neck and he realizes that if it wasn’t for the fact that yukhei constantly had the biggest grin on his face, jeno would be pretty scared of him too.

jaemin gets caught up in a conversation with chenle and yukhei falls behind to talk to jeno as they troop out the door, and jeno feels bad for having to give yukhei a disappointing answer when the latter asks him about his bike.

“i don’t actually have one,” says jeno, unconsciously scratching the back of his neck, a sheepish smile on his face. “i came with jaemin on his bike.”

“oh, that’s cool, do you wanna take mine? jisung generally bugs jaemin into taking him on his bike and i could annoy renjun or chenle into taking me on their bike if you wanna ride one on your own,” says yukhei, and jeno can’t help smiling at this boy who’s being so nice to him.

“oh no, i couldn’t do that, you go ahead and take your bike, i’ll ask jaem,” says jeno politely, not wanting to reveal that in actuality, he does know how to ride a bike. he gets around campus on his cycle, and though he has a driving license, he never went to driving class, so really, it’s completely useless.

“nah, seriously, jeno, i don’t mind!” persists yukhei, holding out the key to his bike.

and jeno is forced to admit that he doesn’t know how to ride a bike, and there’s only a split second as confusion flashes across yukhei’s face, but then it melts away to give way to a caring smile. “do you want me to teach you how?”

jeno can feel jaemin’s eyes on him, an encouraging thumbs-up sent in his direction, and so he shrugs and accepts the offer. luckily, he’s a fairly quick learner, so in less than ten minutes, they’re off to the pet shop, with jeno on yukhei’s bike with yukhei on the back of jaemin’s bike next to him, cheering him on. definitely his favorite.

renjun’s sister is just closing up as they all turn up at the pet store, jisung and chenle at the front because they’re her favorites and renjun says there’s a higher chance she won’t tell them to fuck off. he turns out to be right, and jeno makes a beeline for the cats while most of the others go to play with the puppies. jeno is already cooing paternally at the kittens when jaemin comes over to join him.

“how’re you liking this?” asks jaemin with a soft smile as he takes a seat next to jeno, who’s picked up a kitten who is now nearly falling asleep in his arms.

“i’m here for the cats and yukhei,” grins jeno, as jaemin scooches closer to gently stroke the cat. “they’re both very cute.”

jaemin withdraws his hand, narrowing his eyes at jeno. “do you fancy yukhei?”

“nana, please, i’ve known him for literally less than an hour,” says jeno dismissively, shaking his head. “generally takes me a while longer than that to catch feelings for someone.”

“it once took me a solid one and a half minutes to fall for someone,” remarks jaemin, with misplaced pride.

“shallow,” chuckles jeno. “the kid from freshman orientation?”

“duh,” jaemin coos at another cat who looks unsure of whether she should come over. “to this day he remains the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen in my life.”

“i’m offended, look at how good i look in eyeliner,” jeno pretends to sulk as jaemin laughs, making a comment about how jeno’s a close second.

“if you haven’t found him in two and a half years, you might as well give it up, you know,” shrugs jeno airily. “maybe he already has a girlfriend. or boyfriend.”

“maybe he was equally struck by me and we just have extremely bad luck,” says jaemin absolutely seriously, meeting jeno’s eyes for a weirdly intense second before bursting into laughter. “i’m joking! of course i got over that ages ago. i’m not still hung up on them, don’t look at me like that.”

“whatever, weirdo,” mutters jeno, turning back to the cats. he could care less about jaemin’s old crushes, but something about how the orientation kid comes up in conversation often enough gets on some nerve of jeno’s. something about the light in jaemin’s eyes when he talks about that particular crush, jeno doesn’t see that when jaemin talks about anyone else. it’s kind of annoying. what kind of person would be stuck on a fleeting crush that they barely saw for a couple minutes for _two and a half years?_

“alright, time’s up, kids,” says renjun’s sister loudly after a few more minutes, and chenle pouts, to no effect, following which they all have to leave, donghyuck trying to loudly calculate how much time it will take them to get to the lake to drown out renjun’s and jisung’s discussion on how they’re going to summon some spirits and have them drown both mark and donghyuck.

jeno gives yukhei back his bike this time, and sits back on the jaemin’s bike, and it feels weird to be hugging jaemin as they zip through empty country roads, since most of their hugging interactions are generally jaemin with his arms wrapped loosely around jeno at literally any time he feels like it, and not the other way around.

all the same, there’s something nice about it, even if jeno starts becoming concerned at the amount that jaemin starts shivering at the weather. jaemin has always had a weak disposition for the cold, and even though he’s wearing a jacket, it isn’t providing him enough protection.

“you alright there, nana?” asks jeno when they stop to check the map again because yukhei accidentally told them to take the wrong fork in the road. he wraps his arms around jaemin a little tighter as jaemin leans back to rest his head in the hollow of jeno’s neck. 

jeno can hear the smile in jaemin’s voice as he responds with, “for now, yeah,” and a shiver runs through jeno this time, though he isn’t entirely sure if it’s because of the cold.

he doesn’t have much to think about that because they arrive at the lake soon enough, and renjun speed-walks through the five stages of grief before he even gets off his motorcycle.

“let’s just sit here for a while, i’m not moving, thank you very much,” declares renjun, resolutely taking a seat on the grass on the upper bank of the lake and with one glare, getting both jisung and yukhei to sit down with him.

jeno takes a seat next to yukhei, but jaemin doesn’t sit next to him, because he’s having a conversation with donghyuck in hushed whispers and the expressions on their face keep switching. one looks angry, the other looks teasing, and then the other way around. 

jeno doesn’t want to be a part of that conversation, but yukhei is currently engrossed in a conversation with renjun and chenle in rapid chinese and jeno can’t be a part of that conversation. jisung doesn’t seem like he wants to talk to anyone, and hell, jeno doesn’t really want to talk to anyone either, so he just stares out into the lake hoping he looks dark and mysterious or whatever aura he intended to project tonight.

“you don’t seem scared.” jeno’s head whips to the person who’s seemingly addressed him, and sure enough, mark lee is looking directly at him, a bemused smile resting gently on his lips. “i’ve always wanted to bring the others here to freak them out a little bit, but also to get them over their unnatural fear of this place, but you seem completely unbothered. too tame for you?”

jeno laughs. “i go to haunted houses for the fun of it, and also to reinforce my belief that everything that scares you is engineered by other human beings so really, there’s nothing to be scared about. therefore, to answer your question, yeah, it’s kinda tame for me.” jeno has, in actuality, never been inside a haunted house in his life, because he’s been too scared to ever enter one, but that doesn’t mean he has to tell mark that.

mark looks mildly impressed. jeno’s eyes travel to his lip ring again. he still doesn’t get why donghyuck finds it attractive. “that’s a way of looking at it that i could get on board with. you hear a lot about aliens and ghosts when you’re friends with this lot” - he tilts his head towards the three having the conversation on the side - “and so it’s nice to occasionally talk to someone who has a brain cell or two.”

he says the second part a little louder, earning a scowl and an “if you weren’t older than me, i’d beat you up for that,” from renjun.

“and don’t be mistaken, jeno doesn’t have brain cells,” interjects donghyuck, from his side conversation. “anyone who willingly chooses to spend time with jaemin doesn’t have any more brain cells, jaemin’s a convicted brain cell stealer.”

“can you shut the fuck up, i swear,” jaemin lets out a tired sigh, pulling donghyyuck by the arm in the direction away from the group, right along the edge of the river.

“you guys, be careful!” calls out chenle. “that side of the river is mossy, so make sure you don’t—”

a squeak. a thud. a scream. a splash. a couple more screams.

“—fall in.”

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


it takes jaemin a couple minutes to register where exactly he is when he opens his eyes. he’s in a bed that isn’t his own, but his surroundings are still familiar.

he doesn’t remember much of what transpired the previous night. he remembers falling into the lake, panic kicking in hard because he doesn’t know how to swim to save his life, and that’s exactly what was on the line here. he remembers mark and chenle jumping in to pull him out, jeno and donghyuck checking him for injuries, riding on the back of yukhei’s bike for ages and ages, tucking himself against yukhei’s broad back to shield himself from the cold.

and after that it’s a little hazy, but jaemin knows he didn’t go home. he couldn’t have gone home like that. his parents would’ve straight up murdered him for staying out that late, not so much for almost dying.

he tries to raise his head, but it feels like someone took out his lightweight brain and replaced it with a couple bricks. he scrunches his eyes and tries to take a deep breath, only to discover, with deep dismay, that his nasal passages are blocked. of course he caught a cold, he fell into a freezing lake, why wouldn’t he catch a cold?

“you’re awake? finally,” jaemin turns his head towards the source of the voice to see jeno striding towards the bed with a glass of something in his hand. “i was just about to wake you up anyway.”

“what time is it?” rasps out jaemin, raising himself onto his elbows before collapsing back onto the pillows.

“it’s nearly eleven,” informs jeno as he takes a seat on the bed next to jaemin. “you feeling any better?”

“i don’t know, everything’s kinda fuzzy after yukhei dropped us back here,” he points to the glass in jeno’s hand. “is that coffee?”

“nope, i made you peppermint tea, you idiot,” says jeno, shaking his head as he holds the glass out to jaemin. “it’s the only thing that liu keeps in the cupboard. i googled it, it’s apparently supposed to be good for colds.”

“how bad was i yesterday?” groans jaemin, succeeding in his attempt to sit up this time. he feels mildly embarrassed for some reason, mostly because of the concern in jeno’s eyes. jaemin can barely make eye contact. he’s crashed at jeno’s several times over the last couple years, but that was when either both of them were a mess, or when jeno was a mess. jaemin was never the mess on his own, and that’s exactly what it feels like this time.

“well, you fell asleep on me while i was drying your hair and then proceeded to cling onto me like a frickin’ koala so i couldn’t even dump you on yango’s bed. you see that area of less than a foot between you and the wall? that’s where i was sleeping, brat.” jeno’s half-grinning as he’s trying to say all of this in the most nonchalant tone he can muster, but there’s something off.

color rises to jaemin’s cheeks as he just focuses on the tea. “sorry.”

“nah, it’s okay,” jeno’s tone is softer and jaemin thinks it’s okay to look up now. big mistake. jeno’s eyes match his voice and jaemin can feel his heart thud in his chest because something about jeno looking at him with a gaze that soft affects him and jaemin really shouldn’t be exposed to this first thing in the morning.

jeno’s hand hovers like he’s about to reach out for jaemin’s face, but he decides against it and covers up the action with a forced smile, leaving jaemin to finish his tea as he leaves to go take a shower.

something’s changed, but jaemin can’t think of what it could possibly be.

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


“it’s biking night!” yells jaemin as he bursts into jeno’s dorm room to find jeno sitting on the floor, surrounded by papers and his laptop, his glasses sliding down his nose and a very stressed look on his face. “my classes are over early and until we leave, i am extremely bored and i want food.”

“yeah, i don’t know if i’ll be able to make it, i am very very stressed right now,” breathes out jeno, pressing his fingers to his temple. “i have to correct all these papers and enter the grades for a class of eighty and i completely forgot about this. i have to submit all of this in the next three hours or my professor’s going to _kill_ me and i don’t know how i’m going to do that—”

“whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down,” says jaemin, dumping his bag next to the door and then proceeding to take a seat next to jeno. “i’ll help you out, we’ll get this done in no time.”

jeno looks uncertain and jaemin scoffs, “do you really not trust me on this? i took building systems in my first year. i aced it, topped the class and whatnot.”

“alright, fine,” a faint smile flits across jeno’s face. “i’m technically not allowed to do this because my professor is a pompous asshole who thinks that me sharing my work with other teaching assistants is a sin that’ll get me sent straight to hell. he’s like”—jeno pulls his glasses down his nose and peers at jaemin threateningly— “ _listen lee, i only pick the best of the best as my teaching assistants, which means that i expect your best work, alright? your. best. work._ ”

jaemin laughs, flicking jeno’s forehead and directing his gaze back to the stack of papers. “get to work, you dork.”

they work in silence, with jaemin occasionally asking jeno whether it’s okay to award marks for certain answers that look a little questionable. jaemin gets tired after a while, stretching out and placing his head on jeno’s lap as he continues to grade papers. jeno finishes his stack before jaemin, but they’re done with evaluating and entering the grades in just under two hours.

jeno collapses in relief, starfishing out on the floor as jaemin gets up, holding a hand out to jeno. “come on, if we leave in the next five minutes, we can still make it.”

jeno whines, refusing to take jaemin’s hand at first, but finally reaching out with a groan as jaemin reminds him exactly who did half his work.

“i think i deserve something in return for my help,” smirks jaemin, as jeno tiredly rubs his eyes. “a plane? a couple creative design assignments done? a kiss? who knows.”

“i can’t afford that, i hate creative design and sure, why not.” jeno’s reply is so unbelievably casual that jaemin’s mind takes a minute and a half to process it.

jaemin’s voice drops a couple notches as he confirms, “what now?”

“i don’t have the time or the money for your first two demands but i suppose the third is the easiest,” shrugs jeno, and jaemin is frozen in place as jeno leans in to place a soft kiss on jaemin’s forehead. his lips are slightly chapped but warm, and jaemin doesn’t even know how to react. “there, thanks for your help, you dumbass. i’m going to go change into my biking clothes.”

and he leaves jaemin standing there, brain muddled and heart hyperactive, wondering what just happened. the jeno from two years ago wouldn’t have done that. hell, the jeno from two weeks ago wouldn’t have done that.

“i was joking about that, i’d rather you buy me doritos!” yells jaemin as some of his functions of thought and speech return to him.

“nah, i’ve done my part, you buy yourself doritos!”

jaemin just huffs petulantly and doesn’t reply to that, simply making a mental note to buy some doritos later.

“you don’t wanna change?” asks jeno, walking out with his eyeliner all smudged (probably because he couldn’t do it right and thought smudging it was a better idea), throwing his new jacket over his shoulder with one hand as he messes up his hair slightly with his other hand.

jaemin looks down at the all-denim outfit he’s wearing and shakes his head. “do you think i should?”

“nah, you always look good,” smiles jeno, and jaemin’s grinning like a dope as they go downstairs to get his bike.

“you’re taking a different route?”

“we’re not going to the same place.”

“why?”

“yeah, i didn’t tell you this because you don’t like really large groups all that much, but the guys you met last week? they’re only one-fourth of the people who meet up every two weeks.”

“what now?”

“yeah, there’s like twenty others, but you’ll love them, don’t worry!”

“nana, i frickin’ _hate_ you—”

as they’re heading back at the end of the night, though, jaemin thinks jeno might not hate him all that much.

“i’m so tired,” yawns jeno as he rests his head on jaemin’s shoulder as jaemin revs up the bike. jaemin doesn’t say anything on the way back, just focuses on the road and tries to assimilate whatever he’s witnessed in the last few hours.

jeno’s gotten so confusing. so, so confusing. jeno was always the easiest person for jaemin to understand, but now jaemin just feels a little out of his depth, and that confuses him all the more. they had a certain dynamic too, one that’s undergone some changes very recently, and jaemin just can’t wrap his head around it.

_nice to see jeno opening up,_ renjun had said as he walked up to jaemin, who had been waiting for jeno to finish his animated conversation with yuna, soobin and seungmin.

jaemin had frowned at that. first of all, it had taken jeno _months_ to open up to him. and second of all, this animated, flirty, suave human being, whoever he was, was not, could definitely _never_ be, lee jeno.

but jaemin is watching him with his own eyes, and he’s seen so many things so uncharacteristic to jeno that he literally wouldn’t believe anyone who told him that jeno winked at hyunjin. that jeno effortlessly joined in a conversation with ryujin and felix once renjun dragged him over to introduce him. that jeno had acted so extroverted and charming to every person who interacted with him over the course of those four hours.

jaemin wonders if jeno has magic eyeliner, because the persona that jeno projects when he’s with the bikers is so unlike the soft, model student jeno that jaemin is used to, the one who’s accidentally fallen asleep while studying in the library way too many times, the one who’s so adorably flustered at anyone showing the slightest bit of interest towards him, the one who talks of his cats like they are his children.

this jeno is a little rougher around the edges, smirks a little more than the average human being, has a glint in his eyes to rival onyx, and talks like he’s making you feel special by just holding a conversation with you. and he has an effect on people, and jaemin can see that as well, in the way ryujin’s hand rests lightly on jeno’s arm or the way soobin drinks in the sight of jeno throwing his head back while laughing.

jeno is a catchy beat who’s getting stuck in the head of every person he interacts with, and jaemin can’t reconcile that beat with the gentle melody that he’s used to, the musical notes that he’s become so familiar with.

it almost feels like college jeno and biker jeno are two different people, and jaemin can’t bridge his impressions to make it make sense in his head.

there’s another thing that’s confusing him. college jeno makes jaemin want to take him out on dates and hug him tight and lounge with him on lazy saturdays and watch bad movies with him. biker jeno makes jaemin want to be pinned against a wall and kissed senseless.

yet it feels wrong to be crushing on biker jeno. because biker jeno isn’t college jeno. and yet he is. because they’re both jeno. and jaemin isn’t in the right headspace to process that information.

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


a few more weeks of biking meet-ups featuring jeno’s double persona later, and jaemin descends more and more into absolute bafflement at how jeno manages the switch that smoothly, that effortlessly. the same boy who’s out flirting with ryujin and renjun at the same time is the same boy who’s complaining about his courseload to jaemin on the way over and falling asleep on jaemin’s shoulder on the way back.

renjun’s even taught him how to do a couple stunts, which means that jeno’s attractiveness index just shoots up terribly and messes with jaemin on so many levels, even though he knows that falling for jeno was futile from the very beginning.

there are times when jaemin doubts what they have, like when he bursts into jeno’s room only to find a mildly miffed jeno who gives jaemin a glare in response to his entrance, not even in his biking attire yet. “why didn’t you answer any of my texts?”

“yeah, sorry about that, i was out with eric,” explains jaemin before realizing that that wasn’t exactly the best move, considering that that statement just makes the frown on jeno’s face deepen. “we were just getting some coffee together.”

jeno mutters something under his breath, and jaemin asks him to repeat that.

“sounded like you were on a date.” the syllables are sharp. 

“i wasn’t on a date,” laughs jaemin, toeing off his shoes. “we’re just friends. plenty of people get coffee together.”

“you sure? because getting coffee with the boy who’s infamously had a crush on you for a whole year could be seen as a date to any outsider who knows of that fact,” remarks jeno. “and there are a _lot_ of outsiders.” a pause. “are you sure you’re just friends? generally _just friends_ is a phrase that’s used to make people think you aren’t in a relationship, but i should tell you that that’s so cliche you just end up reinforcing the exact opposite.”

"why are you suddenly being so suspicious?" jaemin takes a seat next to jeno on the bed and pulls him so that jeno's head rests on his lap.

jeno shrugs, eyes not lifting from his book. "just asking in general."

"he's just a friend," says jaemin breezily, still trying to figure out why the question was asked. "i have lots of friends."

"yeah, i know you have lots of friends," jeno's words have an edge, one that confuses jaemin. he's never heard jeno say anything about any of his friends before. he squints at jeno suspiciously, but jeno still doesn't look up.

"am i not allowed to have friends?" jaemin uses a joking tone, because he feels like unless he goes for a change in tone, it could escalate. into what? he's not sure.

"no, of course you can," jeno looks up from his book, "but do they know that you're just their friend?"

jaemin frowns for the nth time in the conversation. "what is that even supposed to mean?"

"i'm saying," jeno shuts the book, and there's definitely a snappish edge to his voice now, "that your habit of flirting with literally every human being on the planet could cause some others the slightest amount of confusion if they think that you look at them like they're something special."

"i flirt with everyone, unconsciously." jaemin's getting defensive now. jeno's head is still on his lap, but it's feeling heavier by the second. "and i mean, everyone is special in some way or another—"

"special to you, nana, special to you." jeno's voice is deathly calm, and he's giving jaemin a very significant look as he sits up to face him.

"you're telling me that he thinks that i might be interested in him?" that wasn't jaemin's intention at all, but sometimes it's a common misconception that people fall into when they're getting to know him. it's a misconception that they grow out of the first time they ever hear jaemin speak jeno's name. "he knows that's not the case."

jeno picks up the book again. "as long as you're sure," he says in a tone that he uses only to provoke jaemin.

"and even if he does, i don't see why that's a problem to you," jaemin's fishing for the reason now, having mildly caught on but too deep in denial to allow himself to consider that possibility.

jeno freezes, almost imperceptibly. he looks up, forcing a smile onto his face. "of course not."

jaemin sighs. "what is it, i know you're not saying something."

jeno seems to mull over whether to be honest or not, but he settles with a cryptic "don't go breaking hearts you don't know how to fix."

jaemin tilts his head slightly, confused, because this entire conversation seems pretty hypocritical coming from jeno, who reads jaemin’s expression easily, shaking his head, mildly exasperated. "i'm just saying, be careful about who you flirt with. you don't want attention from the wrong people."

"so you're telling to only flirt with people that i want attention from?" clarifies jaemin, with a wicked eyebrow raise.

"essentially," nods jeno, closing the book again. "whatever. i gotta go change."

"so the point of this whole conversation was for you to tell me... to be careful who i flirt with?" asks jaemin slowly, as jeno scooches past him to get off the bed.

jeno pauses. "yeah. so?" he sounds too nonchalant for that to not to be rehearsed.

"nothing, nothing," smiles jaemin. "go change, you look like you could afford to cut loose for a while. it must be exhausting being such boyfriend material all the time."

jeno frowns first, then shakes his head in disbelief as he gets off the bed. he turns around, looking hesitant so as to whether he should say something, but decides against it, stalking off to his closet with no more words.

the grin that rests on jaemin’s face after that exchange is quickly extinguished when biker jeno makes his appearance once more, and jeno, flirting with the idea of flirting once more, causes another little part of jaemin to die.

jaemin gets a mild reprise during quiz week, which means that between stressing about environmental engineering and practically living in the library, jaemin doesn’t really have that much headspace to spend on his current dilemma. especially considering the fact that jeno has fallen back so deep into his usual college persona that biker jeno feels a bit like a recurring fever dream.

it’s a return to familiarity, though, and jaemin enjoys having jeno all to himself for the entire day, each of them studying their respective material for the next quiz. they go for lunch together and get something to eat in the early evening because jeno says that dinner makes him sleepy. they cut loose for a couple hours after each quiz, playing video games or going for long walks with no destination.

jeno once suggests that they take jaehyun’s bike and go for a ride, but jaemin nixes that idea saying that jaehyun can only be willfully ignorant once a week, so abusing that privilege would lead to jaehyun not letting jaemin take his bike at all, and of course they wouldn’t want that.

jaemin’s immune system lets him down for the nth time on friday afternoon, when a headache traps him first, then a cold, followed by a temperature.

“this sucks,” huffs jaemin as he curls up further into jeno’s sheets as jeno sits on the floor, downloading a movie so they can watch it together. “why couldn’t i get sick _during_ the quizzes instead of right when they finish?”

“because the universe hates you, nana, no other explanation,” says jeno, swiftly dodging jaemin’s retaliating kick. “maybe if you had taken the weather into consideration before downing three juices that were 70 percent ice, you wouldn’t have fallen sick.”

“you should’ve stopped me, isn’t that your job?” whines jaemin, rolling over to the wall so that jeno has space to sit on the bed with him.

“as your best friend, stopping you from doing stupid things is not my job. my job is to do stupid things with you,” laughs jeno, looping an arm around jaemin as jaemin curls up against jeno’s side, placing his head on jeno’s chest.

“it is your job when you know that my immune system is a bitch,” sighs jaemin. “you failed at that, so now you’re stuck with an even more annoying job, and that’s taking care of me when i’m sick because you know i don’t wanna go home this weekend.”

“okay, i can deal with that,” says jeno, pretending to sigh as he presses play on the movie. “but i don’t know how to cook at all, and you don’t have a mess card, so i guess we’ll have to order in. maybe from that soup place. isn’t soup supposed to be good for sick people?”

“see, you’re not doing half bad,” giggles jaemin, lifting his head to press a kiss to jeno’s cheek, something that jeno doesn’t even react to anymore. again, part of the dynamic that jaemin is very used to, and he likes it that way.

jaemin turns out to be extremely low-maintenance though, because he falls asleep halfway through the movie and all the way into the next day, and all jeno does is make fun of him.

“you’re off caffeine for one day and you sleep for seventeen hours straight?” chortles jeno as jaemin eats the ramyeon that yangyang made, all with a disgruntled look that he’s had on since the first thing jeno said to him after he woke up was a spoiler for the end of the movie.

“leave me alone, i don’t sleep very often,” grumbles jaemin.

“would explain why you’re sick so often,” says jeno, flicking jaemin gently on the forehead. “i don’t think you have a single healthy habit to your name.”

“i don’t think you have a single life skill to your name,” counters jaemin. “you don’t even know how to cook, what good is getting eight hours of sleep going to do?”

“how are you somehow even more annoying when you’re sick?” asks jeno. “sickness is supposed to mellow you out, make you easier to be around because you’re too sick to mouth off that often.”

“i’m very good with anything to do with my mouth,” grins jaemin slyly, and that earns him a harder flick on the forehead. “ouch, that hurt!”

“i’m not apologizing for that,” says jeno, leaving jaemin dramatically groaning about awful best friends and how his forehead stings so much.

it’s late in the evening, and jeno’s voice is kind of tentative as he asks, “are we going biking?”

“i’m still kinda tired,” says jaemin plainly, eyes on his phone. “but you should go.”

“i don’t wanna go without you,” says jeno, crashing onto the bed next to jaemin, the dip in the bed causing jaemin’s character in the game to die in the game. jaemin puts his phone down with a sigh.

“you’ve been active on the group all week, you and xuxi haven’t shut up about how much you’re excited to go to the hills,” reminds jaemin. “you should go.”

“the whole reason i go is so that you don’t feel third-wheeled around mark and hyuck, remember,” smiles jeno.

“that was weeks ago, that’s how it started out. now you’re a full-fledged member.” 

jaemin tries not to sound bitter, but it’s difficult. to this day, the only member that jaemin actually feels close to is chenle. everyone else is fun to be around, but jaemin can’t seem to fit in or connect with them the way jeno does, and that doesn’t make him feel good about himself, because he’s always been the extrovert between the two of them, and this is the first situation he’s encountered where jeno gets along with people a lot better than him.

and it would be completely chill if jaemin could simply not constantly feel like there was something off about jeno’s biker side. the part of jaemin that’s rational tells him that people have a plethora of sides depending on who they're interacting with, and that this is simply one of jeno’s that jaemin isn’t used to, but the rest of him feels completely caught off guard around biker jeno, and jaemin hates feeling like that.

jaemin knows that the fault of him feeling like this is not jeno’s, but his own mental block, and that truthfully, he’s feeling a lot better and could actually make it to the meeting, but he just wants to stay home and be left alone, because a childish part of him feels like none of them would find it that big of a deal whether he showed up or not.

“i know, but still,” says jeno, eyes soft in a way that jaemin finds it difficult to actually meet them. “if you’re sick, we’ll just go to the hills a different time.”

jaemin wraps his fingers loosely around jeno’s wrist, shaking his head. “yeah, we’ll go another time, but don’t let me being sick stop you from going, for real. i want you to go, jen, listen to me. i always know better.” this time jaemin actually finds the strength to look jeno in the eye, hoping that will convince jeno to go.

“you don’t, but okay,” concedes jeno, getting up off the bed to go change.

jaemin tinkers with his phone until jeno comes back in his usual getup that jaemin doesn’t really want to look at at the moment, so he holds up a plain thumbs-up to jeno’s concerned “you sure you’re going to be okay?”

jeno walks over to the bed and jaemin’s character dies yet again, causing jeno to laugh at the music that gleefully announces that jaemin has failed yet again.

“if you need anything other than extra lives for that game, just call me,” says jeno, dipping his head down to kiss jaemin’s forehead.

jaemin smiles. “you still feel guilty about flicking me on the forehead too hard, don’t you?”

“i thought you’d have forgotten,” chuckles jeno, looking sheepish. he picks up his wallet and keys and throws a salute laughingly at jaemin. “i hate your memory.”

“love you too!” calls out jaemin once jeno’s left, and jaemin knows jeno won’t hear that.

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


“jaem didn’t come?” asks donghyuck, when jeno enters on his own.

“yeah, he’s sick,” informs jeno as he flops down next to renjun, who stares at him in disbelief. “what are you giving me that look for?”

“jaem’s sick,” repeats renjun.

“yeah, that’s what i just said,” says jeno. “it’s not serious or anything, he was running a temperature yesterday but he’s just tired today.” he turns to find yukhei giving him an equally disbelieving look. “ _what?_ ”

“aren’t you supposed to be taking care of him?” asks yukhei, with a sly grin.

“well, i’m not his _babysitter_ —” starts jeno defensively. they aren’t the same person or anything, there can exist one without the other.

“right, just his _boyfriend_ ,” chimes in jisung, and jeno would call him out for making stupid jokes if it wasn’t for the fact that the others were nodding along.

“what do you mean, his _boyfriend?”_ laughs jeno incredulously. “i’m not jaemin’s boyfriend.”

“jeno, it’s okay,” says donghyuck, tone comforting. “everyone here knows anyway.”

jeno frowns in puzzlement. “knows what?”

“knows that you and jaemin are together,” says donghyuck slowly. “you can be open about it, it’s really alright.”

“wait, how…” jeno takes a breath and tries to process this information. “...how did you make that assumption?”

“no assumptions to make,” says mark. “hyuckie can’t keep his mouth shut.”

“remind me to shut your mouth later,” hisses donghyuck, eyes flickering down to mark’s lips.

“i’ll be waiting,” smirks mark, and jeno would be gagging at that whole exchange if not for the fact that he was still extremely perplexed. 

“wait, no, i don’t get it,” says jeno, shaking his head. “hyuck, you should know we aren’t boyfriends. why would you tell them that?”

“because i thought you were together,” says donghyuck resolutely. “don’t you two have feelings for each other? kissed and some shit? i mean, sure, if you’re not putting a label on it, that’s fine, but—”

“backtrack, backtrack, backtrack,” cuts in jeno, throwing his hands in the air. “we _kissed or some shit?_ when did this happen?”

“last semester? i thought this was when you got together?” and jeno squints at donghyuck to see if this is some elaborate joke but donghyuck looks as confused as he does.

there’s a long pause, and jeno’s voice sounds strange to him when he finally says, “may i speak to you outside for a moment?”

donghyuck is mildly freaking out as they walk outside. “oh, shit, this might’ve been all my fault. i think i might’ve assumed something that jaemin didn’t imply, but in my defense, jaemin’s really bad at putting things in a way that the implication taken is really the _only_ implication that you can take away from it so—”

“hyuck, slow down, can you tell me why you made that assumption? from the beginning, please? because i have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about.”

donghyuck takes a deep breath, eyebrows scrunched together. “seriously asking though, you guys _really_ aren’t together?”

“no, hyuck, we’re not, i genuinely have no idea what you’re talking about,” says jeno, firmer this time.

“okay so last semester, sanha’s birthday - all of you got drunk at the dorms, remember?”

jeno nods. he got way too drunk that night. all he remembers in the painful hangover that followed the next day.

“so you were drunk off your ass and jaemin wasn’t that bad but he was kinda drunk too, and you were both headed back to your room and ended up… kissing.”

jeno’s head spins. he does not recall that at all. in fact, there’s a pretty large piece of his memory missing from that night and he never bothered to fill in the gaps.

“jaemin called me about it, right after you deadass passed out in your room. he was crying on the phone because he’s an emotional drunk like that - don’t tell him i told you that - and i asked him the next morning about what had happened after that, and all he told me was that it had been resolved. that’s all he told me. and i assumed you’d talked it out.”

jeno’s brain struggles to catch up. “all i remember was jaemin asking me if i remembered anything from the previous night, and i said no. he laughed and told me that he just wanted to freak me out by asking that, because i hadn’t done anything _too_ stupid.”

“so by saying you resolved it, he just meant you didn’t remember it, fuck,” donghyuck claps his palm to his forehead. “na jaemin, a whole dumbass.”

“why wouldn’t he tell me, though?” jeno’s voice has dropped to a whisper, a rush of anger flooding his veins. jaemin never keeps things from him. sure, it would’ve been a difficult topic to address, but it could’ve been just as easily laughed off. or whatever was supposed to happen, jeno isn’t sure at this point.

“i guess he was embarrassed or something,” says donghyuck quickly, voice a little tight. jeno narrows his eyes at him, and donghyuck reluctantly adds, “okay, he probably didn’t want his heart broken.”

“did he like me or something?”

“sorta. kinda had a crush on you back then. back then.” donghyuck puts emphasis on all the words indicating that this was part of the past, but that hurts jeno even more.

“oh my god, i’m so dumb,” groans jeno. “he’s so dumb, why didn’t he just fucking tell me, i didn’t want to find out this way.”

“i’m sorry, jen, i’m so sorry, this is all my fault, it was just so easy to tease you guys because after the first couple times we all met up the others just assumed and i just confirmed it for them while i didn’t have the accurate information and i’m really sorry about that—”

jeno’s eyes flash with anger, but it isn’t for donghyuck. “don’t apologize. you’re not completely at fault here. sure, you’re a bit of a dumbass, but this is not all your fault.”

“and please be careful about how you bring this up. you know how defensive jaemin can get,” warns donghyuck.

“i’ll try to be careful about it,” says jeno slowly. donghyuck glares at him. “i _promise_ i’ll try to be careful.”

jeno ends up going with the others to the hills, because he knows he can’t go back right away to confront this problem, so he just smiles at yukhei and takes in his infectious enthusiasm, living for now and saving his difficult situation for later.

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


“yangyang, where’s the peppermint tea?” asks jaemin, rummaging around the cupboard.

yangyang shrugs, not even looking up from his phone. “peppermint tea? i don’t know, man, i’d never drink that. jeno bought one packet like a few weeks ago, and i have no idea where that would be. all i know is that tea is a disgrace to all beverages and peppermint tea is a disgrace to peppermint.”

jaemin frowns. “really? he said that it’s all you keep here.”

yangyang looks up from his phone with an incredulous grin. “damn, he really can’t own up to doing anything nice, can he? what a dork.”

“huh?”

“he read that peppermint tea is good for colds, and decided to keep a packet here,” says yangyang, with the air of someone giving him the secret to the universe.

“but for what?” chuckles jaemin. “jen barely ever get colds, he loves to brag about how his immune system is so much stronger than mine—” jaemin’s laugh cuts off midway as realization strikes him.

yangyang grins at him. “exactly, dimwit.”

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


maybe, thinks jeno, none of this would be so complicated if jaemin wasn’t such a clingy motherfucker.

jeno thinks it should’ve been an easy enough conversation to have back then, for him at least. they could’ve just agreed to just never talk about it, to accept that shit happened and that they could move on from that, but now there’s extra variables to consider now.

like the fact that jaemin withheld this information from him. like the fact that jeno is unsure whether the time that has passed since this happened has made talking about this better or worse.

like the fact that jeno may now have feelings for jaemin, even though jaemin no longer has any feelings for jeno.

and jeno isn’t sure he’s up to have his heart broken.

and hell, jeno wouldn’t have even suspected that he may have feelings for jaemin if jaemin had never fallen into the lake.

jeno had gotten up while jaemin was still sleeping the next morning. his entire right arm was numb because jaemin’s head had been treating it as a pillow the whole night, and jeno was already framing some colorful insults to use once jaemin got up. he tried to tug his arm out from underneath jaemin’s head, but jaemin just curled in even closer.

there was a crease between his eyebrows, his sleep fitful. jeno guessed that he’d caught another cold.

jeno supposed that there was no harm in just staying in bed a little longer. it wasn’t as though he had anywhere else to be. the crease between jaemin’s eyebrows was bothering him, so jeno gently ran his thumb over it in a sleepy attempt to smoothen it out.

it worked, and jaemin’s expression turned softer, so at least it didn’t look like he was sleeping badly any longer. it made jeno feel slightly better, so he attempted once more to gently pull his arm away, turning in the process. unfortunately for him, jaemin chose this exact moment to throw an arm around him and curl up against jeno’s chest.

so jeno sighed, realizing he was going to be stuck there for a while, and resigned himself to his fate, hugging jaemin close to him and absentmindedly stroking jaemin’s hair. jaemin was warm. something about holding jaemin this close made jeno heart beat faster, just a little.

it made his mind wander, wonder what it would be like to wake up next to jaemin like this every morning. hold him close like this every morning. to witness morning jaemin in all of his glory, complete with puffy face and sleepy smile. to maybe make him coffee, to kiss him with the tinge of coffee still on his lips.

that last thought tripped jeno. to _kiss_ jaemin. to kiss _jaemin._ it tripped jeno that _that_ thought had stemmed from his own subconscious. it tripped jeno that he didn’t even feel like that had been the first time he’d ever considered that. it tripped jeno that he’d gone this long without realizing that he wanted to kiss his best friend, because looking back, it _really_ felt like he’d had the thought before.

jeno had pressed his cheek against the top of jaemin’s head and sighed. things were about to get complicated. 

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


it’s been five days since his conversation with donghyuck. jeno is correcting assignments (this time ahead of schedule because he’s learnt his lesson) and jaemin is making noodles in the corner of the room, brushing his bangs impatiently out of his eyes as he prods the noodles cake impatiently.

tired of his own hesitation getting the better of him, jeno finally makes the impulsive decision of finally blurting out what’s been on his mind over the last few days.

“why didn’t you tell me we kissed?”

jaemin’s head snaps towards him in surprise, his mouth opening as though about to answer the question before his eyebrows draw together, doubting whether he heard jeno right, so jeno does him a favor and repeats the question.

“didn’t think it was of any importance,” says jaemin, shrugging with forced nonchalance as he turns his attention back to the noodle cakes. “how did it suddenly come to mind? did your mind just randomly throw up this missing piece of memory?”

“hyuck thought we were dating because you told him the kiss had been _resolved,”_ says jeno, figuring there’s no point in lying or beating around the bush. “and hell, i don’t blame him.”

“lee donghyuck. i’m going to murder his ass,” hisses jaemin, an angry scowl taking over his facial features.

“any rational person would’ve thought the same,” continues jeno. the last thing he wants to do is drive a wedge between donghyuck and jaemin. “why didn’t you just tell him i didn’t remember it at all?”

“because it was stupid and i just said that in passing,” says jaemin defensively. “why are we even discussing this? how does it matter what i tell donghyuck?”

“you’re free to tell donghyuck whatever you want,” says jeno, and he can feel his words becoming sharper as a reaction to jaemin’s defensiveness, but he tries to reel himself in. “all i’m asking is why you didn’t tell me. that’s an important piece of information. you should’ve told me.”

“it would’ve just made things awkward, wouldn’t it?” jaemin shakes his head. “it would’ve messed up our friendship so bad. you, of all people, should know that withholding information is perfectly acceptable when there’s an important friendship involved. what could have even come out of discussing this?”

jaemin is becoming increasingly flustered with every sentence, his words mushing together into a mess of coherent emotion. jeno holds up his arms in a surrender of sorts, trying to be the rational one. this is _not_ how he expected this conversation to turn out. “nana, calm down.”

“god, i’m going to kill hyuck,” mutters jaemin, staunchly not looking at jeno. a silence falls over them, and unlike the previous one, this one doesn’t feel pleasant at all. it pricks at jeno’s skin with something that feels a lot like regret.

“anything else you haven’t told me?” asks jeno, keeping his voice soft on purpose so that he doesn’t come across as too accusatory. “you can say it now, we won’t bring it up again after this.”

jaemin holds on to the sullen silence for a while, and jeno thinks he’s ignoring the question completely, until jaemin finally speaks up, his voice barely audible as he says, “you go a little overboard when we go biking.”

“wait, what is that supposed to mean?”

“it means i don’t get why you have to act like you’re so _suave_ all the time. the whole _i’m sexy and i know it_ charade. kinda goes overboard sometimes. i don’t even know why you started acting like a whole different person, and i don’t understand it at all, and it constantly feels like i’m looking at a stranger.” 

jaemin says all of this in one breath, which makes it seem like he’s been holding on to this thought for a long time, and that somehow makes it hurt more. jeno knows exactly why he started projecting that persona. jeno’s middle name is _insecure._ jeno constantly worries about not fitting in. jeno constantly worries that there really isn’t that much to him other than being the straight up dork that everyone assumes him to be.

which is why he saw this whole biking thing as an opportunity to break out of the mould that he’s so comfortably fit into his whole life. a chance to change how people see him.

but that also has its drawbacks, because despite jeno’s efforts to be more extroverted, like every person in his life has constantly berated him to do, his social battery runs down and he’s stuck in the middle of a flirting match with someone who might actually be taking his flirting seriously, and the disappointed look on their face when he has to reel himself back a little to not lead them on too much stays with him a lot longer than the satisfaction of creating a witty pickup line.

of course, it doesn’t help that jaemin chooses the biking meetups as the time to become unexpectedly introverted, choosing to hold casual conversation with whoever is closest and not particularly going out of his way to talk to anyone except chenle and donghyuck. sometimes jeno catches jaemin’s eye from across the room and tries to wave him over, but jaemin doesn’t indulge him very often.

“do you really hate it that much?” asks jeno, the slight quiver is his voice buried by the overtone of defiance. why did it matter what jaemin thought of his biker persona? was he really about to be a pissy bitch about how it was easier for jeno to get along with people there than jaemin?

“jen, i don’t _hate_ it, it just makes me feel so out of my depth,” sighs jaemin. “it’s like _who is that person?_ that’s not my best friend.” there’s a little more hurt coloring his words as he goes on. “two and a half years i’ve known you and i thought i knew enough about you to not be surprised anymore. and now i’m just stuck here wondering which person you are. it’s so confusing.”

“not as confusing as you, though,” retorts jeno, retreating into a shell and preparing for defense like he generally does when he feels like he’s under attack. “you don’t tell me we’ve kissed, and you lash out when i bring it up. you take me to the biking meets because you want company and yet you’re angry that i actually get along with the people there. you make it seem like you haven’t moved on since your flash crush in freshman orientation, but sometimes it really feels like—” jeno’s words abruptly cut off.

“feels like what, jeno?” jaemin’s tone is smooth, like the motion of a killer running his finger across a sharp blade.

jeno struggles with himself. this has been hands down, the worst conversation that he has ever had with anyone, and that includes the time when he found out that his girlfriend from school, the one he was madly in love with, was of the opinion that bisexuality didn’t exist. that was the first time jeno’s heart broke. the second time was during his first semester, the one that had preceded his infamous agreement with jaemin.

this conversation had done nothing but veer completely off the track it was supposed to take, and nothing jeno can say now can stop impending catastrophe, so he takes a deep breath and decides to be plain about it. “do you have feelings for me? do you like me at all in a non-platonic way?”

jaemin’s expression remains tight and angry, his fists clenching and unclenching once. “of course not,” he grits out. “wouldn’t dream of it.”

jeno’s heart breaks a third time.

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


jaemin can kind of remember the moment. it isn’t all the vivid, because memory does have a way of modifying itself over the years, so while jaemin doesn’t exactly remember which part of the hall he was standing in, or who half the members of his treasure hunt team were, or whether the loud grainy voice announcing over the microphone was a male or a female, he does remember the mind-numbing boredom that permeated every cell of his being.

treasure hunts weren’t exactly his favorite activities in the whole world. they required both logic and patience, two things that jaemin refused to use unless absolutely necessary.

a senior had walked up, tapping impatiently on his clipboard. “does your team already have eight members?”

one of the others nodded and the senior let out a tired sigh, impatiently waving along someone who was trailing behind him as they walked over to the next group.

that was when jaemin saw him for the first time. the most beautiful person he’d ever seen in his life.

jaemin doesn’t remember what was the pattern on the shirt he was wearing, but he remembers the way the boy had been cracking his knuckles anxiously, though trying to remain inconspicuous about the habit. jaemin remembers how the boy’s black hair was neatly combed back, in a way that walked the fine line between goody-goody and smartly dressed. jaemin remembers the wire-rimmed glasses that were perched neatly on the bridge of the boy’s nose, an accessory that jaemin found attractive in general, but all the more attractive on this particular boy.

jaemin remembers taking his time to take in the sight of this unbelievably ethereal boy, the likes of which had never affected jaemin this much before. everyone else’s eyes seemed to pass right over him, but jaemin was entranced.

jaemin remembers not being able to find the right words to describe the boy accurately while recounting this to donghyuck on the phone later that night. his brain mindlessly threw out adjectives, but as jaemin struggled to conjure up the mental image of the boy so that he could specify him a little better, his neurons failed to carry through.

“you found someone super hot and now you don’t even remember how they look?” jaemin remembers the amused laugh that donghyuck interspersed into his words.

jaemin remembers when exactly the memory came back to him, when he walked into his c.a.d. course, which his branch shared with the architecture students, for the first time, and took a seat. the boy next to him had his head on the desk, an energy drink clutched in his hand. jaemin remembers wrinkling his nose at the thought that he got stuck next to one of the posh kids who went drinking the previous day, the literal day before semester began.

jaemin remembers how startled he was when the boy next to him finally looked up, fixing his crooked wire-rimmed spectacles and squinting at the board.

jaemin doesn’t remember how exactly they started talking, but he remembers that the boy was sleepy not because he was nursing a hangover, but because he was up all night preparing for his classes. jaemin remembers fondly attaching the mental _dork_ tag to this boy.

jaemin could never forget his name, of course. a pretty name for a pretty face for a pretty heart.

lee jeno.

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


jaemin cries himself to sleep. one night, and then the next, and then the one after that as well.

not once in his life had he ever gotten into a fight with jeno, least of all about something this serious, something that wrecked their friendship from the ground up, from its very foundations, because it’s true. after a point you can no longer be friends with the person you have feelings for.

even if you straight up denied those exact same feelings and are now regretting everything.

what could have been the worst that could’ve happened? jeno would’ve probably started feeling uncomfortable in their friendship, prompting him to slowly start putting distance between the two of them, until they eventually ended up strangers. their friendship would’ve died anyway.

and now jaemin’s stuck in the worst case scenario anyway, without even obtaining closure about whether his feelings were reciprocated at all. and it was all his own fault.

what if jeno actually liked him back? and jaemin, caught up in the emotional burn of the moment, had just completely thrown that entire possibility away, only to stalk off like a fucking coward right after he denied the existence of any of those non-platonic feelings that jeno had questioned him for.

it was all donghyuck’s fault, so when he finally calls donghyuck back after day three of the same emotional drama, jaemin makes sure to tell him just as much before angrily hanging up on him. however, he forgets to lock his window, so the first thing he focuses his bleary vision on when he wakes up is a lanky redheaded intruder, leaning on his bedpost and scrutinizing jaemin as though he’s a mildly disgusting science exhibit that can’t be looked away from.

jaemin lets out a screech, but donghyuck looks unimpressed. “i knew you’d stop locking the window if i stopped pulling this stunt for a while. glad i was able to lure you back into thinking you were safe. you’re never safe from me, jaem.”

“fuckin’ buying a padlock as soon as i find the energy to pull myself out of bed,” hisses jaemin, turning over and closing his eyes once more. “thought you’d know better than to show up here again, you fuckin’ traitor. can’t believe you.”

“can’t believe you stormed out on jeno asking if you had feelings for him,” says donghyuck, prodding at the pile of blankets that jaemin is buried under. “there is now a level zero.”

“if you’re just here to make fun of me and quote kung fu panda, then i suggest you leave right now,” grunts jaemin. “i don’t need your bullshit first thing in the morning.”

“and i didn’t need your bullshit when i was about to learn what a lip ring would feel like in places i don’t want to name, but you know what, i didn’t get to choose that either,” huffs donghyuck, as jaemin raises his head from the covers to give donghyuck a scandalized look that’s mistaken for curious. “fine, i’ll name it. it was my dick. he was about to suck me off when you called.”

“god, hyuck, i got the implication!” yells jaemin, pressing his hands against his ears. “i did _not_ need to hear that.”

“but it got you to wake up completely, didn’t it?” grins donghyuck evilly. “get the fuck up, i’m taking you out for breakfast.”

“i don’t want breakfast, i want my best friend back,” groans jaemin, going motionless as donghyuck struggles to pull him off the bed.

“i never went anywhere, dork,” says donghyuck, yanking jaemin off the bed with a couple more tugs. “what you want is your jeno back. not your best friend, not your boyfriend, just your jeno.”

“what is that even supposed to mean,” breathes out jaemin, starfished out on the floor in the mess of covers. “what do you mean, he’s my jeno?”

“hell, boy, i could write a whole essay. i may kiss some of my friends on the cheek platonically but i sure don’t look at them like they hung all the stars in the universe while i’m doing it. i sleep over at my friend’s but never in the same bed. i trust only my mother to take care of me when i’m sick. i don’t get unnecessarily jealous when any of my friends hang out with people who like them, i just encourage them to get laid.” donghyuck makes an exasperated noise. “don’t you understand how weird you guys are? that’s not platonic, whatever the fuck you are.”

“whatever it is, i’m never getting it back,” says jaemin, pouting sadly.

“get the fuck up!” scolds donghyuck with a frustrated sigh, kicking the pile of covers with jaemin in it. jaemin yells out in pain, but donghyuck kicks him a couple more times, punctuating each kick with a _get the fuck up!_ because he knows that if jaemin won’t listen to sense, brute force is his only option.

“you’re going to go brush your teeth, and then we’re going to go for breakfast and figure out how to approach this problem, got it?”

jaemin struggles to his feet, glaring at donghyuck but not contradicting him because he doesn’t want to feel any more pain. (physical pain, that is. jaemin’s got it covered on the emotional front.)

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


jeno should’ve gotten up and walked away. he should’ve known that his ignoring game was not that strong at all.

jeno tries to avoid the piercing gaze that burns into his skull, focusing instead on the computer game in front of him as he takes a sip of the too hot, too dark coffee just to have something to do with his hands. his tongue burns and he coughs a couple times, eyes watering, wondering what fraction of his taste buds he must’ve burned off.

the owner of the gaze, an all too familiar redhead, slides into the seat opposite him, but jeno still doesn’t look up. “hello, lee jeno.”

“donghyuck,” acknowledges the addressed, hitting pause on his game but not looking up just yet. “what are you doing at this coffee shop?”

“i know you like the frappuccinos here, i thought i might buy you one to soothe the aftereffects of trying to down fire.” donghyuck looks with distaste at the steaming cup of coffee that jeno just set down. “were you trying to torture yourself? there are better ways to do that than drinking jaemin’s coffee order, because for real, are you _that_ sad?”

jeno pushes his glasses up his nose, looking in donghyuck’s direction but not directly at him. “maybe. who knows. emotions are just hormonal imbalances in my brain. when there’s more sad juice in my noggin, i need to neutralize it by downing ingestible acid.” he tips the coffee cup in donghyuck’s direction. “cheers.” his tongue burns once more.

donghyuck watches with barely concealed disgust. “wow, yangyang - or as i was asked to address him, yango - was right. you’re a total mess.”

“you know yangyang?” asks jeno, eyes widening. only yangyang’s best friends have permission to call him yango.

“sort of, i guess,” shrugs donghyuck. “i met him when i went to your room looking for you. he told me you’d be here.”

“and he’s already letting you call him yango? he only started letting me call him that after being roommates with him for a whole three semesters,” huffs jeno.

donghyuck just nods slowly, waiting to see if jeno has anything else to add to that. “do you know why i’m here?” he finally asks, after the silence has stretched on for long enough.

“you’re the grim reaper here to take my soul. this entire conversation isn’t really happening, because i’ve already died of caffeine overdose.” jeno can’t help laughing at what he thinks is a witty answer, and donghyuck grimaces.

“every moment i spend with you makes me wonder how jaemin fell for such an absolute dork,” sighs donghyuck, and the mention of jaemin just causes every cell of jeno’s body to go on high alert. he hasn’t talked to jaemin in nearly a week, the longest they’ve ever gone without talking. it makes jeno sad, angry, and once he registers the meaning of donghyuck’s words, confused as well.

“well, he said he doesn’t like me like that,” says jeno. “and i don’t blame him.”

“i blame him,” says donghyuck. “i blame him for being an idiot and a liar.” he points his finger at jeno sharply. “and you’re no better.”

jeno’s too tired to even form a coherent defense because donghyuck is correct. he’s an idiot. “it’s true, yes.”

“jeno, don’t contradict me, you’re a total idiot and i have a list of reasons to back my statement up and—” donghyuck cuts himself off, frowning. “wait, what?”

“yeah, i’m an idiot,” agrees jeno. “you want me to go talk to jaemin, don’t you?”

“that would be the logical conclusion, yes,” says donghyuck, mildly puzzled at how accepting jeno has been. “i was prepared to come here and sacrifice some of my dignity, maybe embarrass you a little, blackmail you some, and then if nothing else worked, resort to begging and annoying you. this was surprisingly easy.”

“it’s not like i completely lack brain cells, hyuck.”

“debatable. you’re friends with jaemin, which means your brain cells decay exponentially with every month you spend with him.”

“would explain why you have next to none, then,” snarks jeno, stowing his laptop in his backpack.

“if you weren’t about to go and boyfriend up my best friend, i would’ve beat the shit outta you for that,” laughs donghyuck, even though they both know donghyuck wouldn’t ever be able to hurt a fly. he throws a set of keys at jeno. “my bike’s outside. do me and jaemin a favor and not crash and die.”

jeno throws him a thumbs-up, beaming, leaving donghyuck revelling in the satisfaction of playing exasperated cupid.

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


jaemin stuffs another dorito into his mouth. “oh, come on, you must be kidding me,” he mutters under his breath as he watches jules ask shawn out at the exact wrong moment. the scene causes him to want to gouge his eyeballs out with a rusty spoon. slow burn - mankind’s worst creation, and yet jaemin found himself addicted to it.

he hears the roar of a very familiar motorcycle outside his house, and is puzzled for a second, because donghyuck literally left barely an hour ago. jaemin peeks out the window as the motorbike sound dies, and his eyes register the very familiar black motorbike with the tacky flames drawn on the side, but the person dismounting it is not donghyuck.

donghyuck doesn’t have such attractive proportions, nor does he wear glasses or walk with the gait of a businessman about to close a major deal, because donghyuck looks nothing like jeno, who is now striding with purpose down jaemin’s driveway, making his way to the front porch.

jaemin’s mind buffers for a solid fifteen seconds before the panic kicks in. he shuts his laptop, dusting the dorito crumbs off his shirt and looking despairingly at his stupid pyjamas-and-mussed-up-hair look in the mirror, wondering if he has time to change before the doorbell rings.

he doesn’t.

jaemin smoothes his sailor moon pyjama shirt, attempting to gather his remaining dignity as he climbs down the stairs. his hand hesitates at the doorknob, wondering if he should open it at all, but he’s so tired of their fight and no matter how this conversation turns out, jaemin just wants closure.

jeno’s glasses are slightly crooked, tinges of red left on his cheek from the whip of the wind. there’s a tentative half-smile on his lips, more awkward than anything else, and his t-shirt hangs off his frame, his hands fumbling, nervously cracking his knuckles.

“hi.”

hearing jeno’s voice again after what feels like an eternity activates some kind of positive feeling in him, something that jaemin can’t recognize yet because it’s been quite a few days since he felt his last positive emotion. “hi,” he replies, sounding almost breathless. “you wanna come in?”

“nah, i think i’ll just stay out here and freeze to death,” shrugs jeno, before stepping into the house gratefully with a shiver. “we need to talk.”

“sorta. maybe. i don’t know. maybe a conversation is in order.” jaemin bounces on the balls of his feet, wondering if he should let jeno talk first before all his impulses, after being impaired from jeno’s sudden appearance, decide to act up at once, prompting him to blurt out, “i might’ve lied that day. i like you. in a non-platonic way. a lot. i like you a lot.”

his words are doing that thing where they’re tripping over each other and making them difficult to understand, but jeno just smiles, placing his freezing hands on either side of jaemin’s face. “that’s good to hear.”

“so you feel the same way?” asks jaemin, eyes filled with wonder like a child opening his presents on christmas morning.

“would i be saying that if i intended to break your heart?” chuckles jeno softly.

jaemin presses his forehead to jeno’s, letting jeno’s arms pull him in closer so there’s no space between their bodies. “i’m sorry i said that shit about your biker persona. you’re actually very hot when you’re all _i’m sexy and i know it._ ”

jeno laughs, embarrassed. “shut up.”

“i don’t think i will, some things just need to be said.”

“yes, but your breath smells like doritos.”

jaemin lets out an embarrassed yell and buries his head in jeno’s shoulder. “do you want me to brush before you kiss me or something?”

jeno gently tilts jaemin’s head upwards, pressing his lips softly to jaemin’s without another word. it’s a short kiss, chaste and tinged with some apology, some relief, some dorito dust and a whole lot of love.

jeno thinks that just about sums it up nicely.

  
  


**———————❖———————**

  
  


jaemin can feel the wind whipping through his hair, his stomach flipping over as jeno turns sharply to show off, bringing the bike to a smooth stop.

“dork,” snarks jaemin as he nearly topples off the bike, his legs shaky as he steadies himself. he’s got to tell renjun to stop teaching jeno stunts. “was that really necessary?”

“no, but you loved it,” grins jeno as he takes jaemin’s helmet off, running an affectionate hand through jaemin’s locks to fix his severe case of helmet hair. jeno’s eyeliner isn’t that smudged today, at least, not in comparison to his lipstick, for which jaemin is to blame.

“it’s absolutely disgraceful that i can’t even deny that anymore,” huffs jaemin.

jeno grins at that, his smoky eyes scrunching up behind his long bangs, a fake lip ring that mark lent him glinting on his lips, and he looks nothing like the idiot who was trying on jaemin’s hoodies earlier in the day, but jaemin loves him the exact same.

because there’s only one lee jeno, and he’s all na jaemin’s.

  
  


**———————❖———————**

**Author's Note:**

> a huge thank you to robin and xie for coordinating the entire fic fest, the only one that i've managed to complete. i lov you guys, you're legends <3
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/thiyatrack) // [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/thiyatrack)


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